Bus Adventures...
During the Michael Jackson trial recently, comedian George Lopez
made a joke, referred to people who rode the LA transit as "War Veterans".
I had to laugh, because I have indeed taken the LA buses, and other
buses around Southern California. I didn't learn how to drive until I was
about 25.
So I put in a lot of time on various buses, and at various bus stops.
Many funny and terrifying things happened. One terrifying aspect is that
men were always trying to pick me up from the bus stops, and sometimes they
were very aggressive and scary.
In rougher neighborhoods I would get "Johns" trying to pick me up all the time.
But they were harmless, as it turned out. The really scary stuff happened in
so-called better parts of town. Twice, not once but TWICE, in LA and also down
here, men of middle Eastern descent in expensive cars acted like practically serial
killers trying to pick me up. One man tried to pick me up at the bustop, I
politely declined, my bus came, I got on the bus. Went to work, several miles away.
I get off the bus, guy pops up from nowhere and says " I just wanted to talk to you!"
Turned out he'd followed the bus! Aaaahhhh!!!
My boss actually called the police.
The other middle- eastern- descent- driving- a- fancy- car- scary- guy was down here
in San Diego, Mission Valley area.
I'm at a bus stop, guy pulls up, asks if I want a ride. I say no. Politely decline.
He proceeds to try and talk me into it, and the scary part was that he got uglier about
it, started calling me names like whore and stuff. Actually started to get out of his car,
I neglected to mention that no one was around, it was a secluded, empty area. He obviously
realized it. He was really mad that I wouldn't agree to take a ride with him, and it seemed
that he was going to take matters into his own hands...
I was going to run, or fight, but it didn't get to that point. Fortunately, right as things were
going to get bad( he was getting out of his car), we both saw a big white guy in a cowboy
hat walking towards me ( the bus stop). It was funny because this was the perfect guy to
happen to show up, as far as looks. Big scary redneck-looking guy.
Scary fancy car guy glared at me but took off.
When redneck guy walked up I said " Whew! I'm so glad to see you! Things almost got
really bad there!"
And the redneck guy says " I got a new pair of jeans!"
And I look at him, and all at once I realize that he's mentally challenged. And in fact, turns out
to be really sweet. A good boy of about 10 years old.
But for the purposes of saving my ass from the scary weirdo, he couldn't have looked more
suitable.
When I used to ride the buses in LA, you would see the name "Chaka" tagged everywhere.
This was hilarious because every bus," Chaka". And I always thought of the little guy from Land of the Lost. That old TV show.
There was this dude from the old hood that had Robert Plant hair but an ugly face, and we all
called him Chaka. : )
So when I would see the name Chaka scrawled everywhere, it would make me smile...
One day I was watching KTLA news, and there was a smiling, sweet- faced Mexican youth
surrounded by reporters, on his way to the courthouse. It was Chaka.
Chaka, as it turns out, was trying to make a name for himself as the most prolific tagger.
And apparently he'd succeeded, because here he was surrounded by the media and brought
up on charges.
What actually happened, if I recall correctly: he was leaving the courthouse after being
sentenced for his tagging crimes. And he tagged "Chaka" in the elevator, and got busted right then, AGAIN! LOL
I'd swear that really happened!
Another funny thing about riding the bus at this time was the hair juice. Those unfamiliar
with the ways of riding the bus could be in for a face full of hair juice, if they didn't watch out.
Here and there, on all the windows, would be these little greasy puffball marks. If you didn't
know, and fell asleep with your head against the window, you'd get this greasy goo on you. Hair juice, from everyone's Jeri curls, where they fell asleep with their heads against the window.
It was the 80's-90's. People were all wearing jeri curls back then.
The prostitutes in the old neighborhood used to stand under a sign across the street, the "Goodbody's Mortuary" sign. Not kidding. I'm sure they realized the joke. I always meant to
take a camera and get pictures of that...
I used to have to take the bus early in the morning, sit at the bus stop on the boulevard and watch the hos glare at me, and the johns try to pick up on me. Finally the ladies sent an
emissary to question me. " You workin?"
This was when I first appeared on the boulevard. They didn't know what to think. Was I
a new ho? Or was I taking the bus, legit? The bus stops were also for Ho business.
And yet they were smart enough to not confront me in a fighting
manner. I'm fairly tall, and unafraid of a few sucked-up crack hos. And they must have
known that. I was looking at them just as much as they were looking at me, curious. But finally one of the hos came over and asked me. " You working?"
Once they found out I was ok, not "working" they relaxed. Came over and chatted and bummed cigs out of me.
I got to recognize them pretty well. The Latina with beautiful legs and a messed up face.
I remember when I first saw her, short black skirt and beautiful body. She turned around
and yikes. Bad acne scars, really bad. All over.
The older hos, the fat hos. The sucked- up scrawny hos.
I was probably the only white girl that could
walk in my neighborhood completely unmolested or disrespected, after dark. The only other
white girl I'd seen was a ho, in a fight with another ho. She had a stick, the other one had a knife.
That was up close and personal, too. I was walking down the street when they came up close to me( Accidentally. They only had eyes for each other).
But anyway, I became familiar with the ladies.
An awful incident happened one morning when the pimp was there...
We were all at the bustop, they had forty ouncers, I had cigarettes. A regular six a.m. party.
For them, anyway.
So we are talking, I think I was telling this one grandmother how young she really did look,
etc. Passing the time.
Suddenly, from behind, someone pushes me. I turn around, and it's someone I've never seen
before. A dweebish looking white guy with glasses. He has an expression of unpleasant surprise
on his face.
" Oh! I'm sorry! I thought you were someone else!"
That's ok, I say.
Except it wasn't ok, to pimp guy. Older black man. I guess he felt kind of pretective of me,
something, because as my bus pulled up I said " I have to go, you guys! Bye!"
They were literally beating the crap out of that guy. And I couldn't prevent it because I had to go! I think I may have said " Oh no, it's ok!"trying to stop them when they were advancing on the guy. But they were set on defending me, apparently.
I think that was actually rather sweet, in a twisted way. They were looking out for me, trying
to protect me. I had apparently inspired their sense of honor. : )
Ah, riding the bus.
made a joke, referred to people who rode the LA transit as "War Veterans".
I had to laugh, because I have indeed taken the LA buses, and other
buses around Southern California. I didn't learn how to drive until I was
about 25.
So I put in a lot of time on various buses, and at various bus stops.
Many funny and terrifying things happened. One terrifying aspect is that
men were always trying to pick me up from the bus stops, and sometimes they
were very aggressive and scary.
In rougher neighborhoods I would get "Johns" trying to pick me up all the time.
But they were harmless, as it turned out. The really scary stuff happened in
so-called better parts of town. Twice, not once but TWICE, in LA and also down
here, men of middle Eastern descent in expensive cars acted like practically serial
killers trying to pick me up. One man tried to pick me up at the bustop, I
politely declined, my bus came, I got on the bus. Went to work, several miles away.
I get off the bus, guy pops up from nowhere and says " I just wanted to talk to you!"
Turned out he'd followed the bus! Aaaahhhh!!!
My boss actually called the police.
The other middle- eastern- descent- driving- a- fancy- car- scary- guy was down here
in San Diego, Mission Valley area.
I'm at a bus stop, guy pulls up, asks if I want a ride. I say no. Politely decline.
He proceeds to try and talk me into it, and the scary part was that he got uglier about
it, started calling me names like whore and stuff. Actually started to get out of his car,
I neglected to mention that no one was around, it was a secluded, empty area. He obviously
realized it. He was really mad that I wouldn't agree to take a ride with him, and it seemed
that he was going to take matters into his own hands...
I was going to run, or fight, but it didn't get to that point. Fortunately, right as things were
going to get bad( he was getting out of his car), we both saw a big white guy in a cowboy
hat walking towards me ( the bus stop). It was funny because this was the perfect guy to
happen to show up, as far as looks. Big scary redneck-looking guy.
Scary fancy car guy glared at me but took off.
When redneck guy walked up I said " Whew! I'm so glad to see you! Things almost got
really bad there!"
And the redneck guy says " I got a new pair of jeans!"
And I look at him, and all at once I realize that he's mentally challenged. And in fact, turns out
to be really sweet. A good boy of about 10 years old.
But for the purposes of saving my ass from the scary weirdo, he couldn't have looked more
suitable.
When I used to ride the buses in LA, you would see the name "Chaka" tagged everywhere.
This was hilarious because every bus," Chaka". And I always thought of the little guy from Land of the Lost. That old TV show.
There was this dude from the old hood that had Robert Plant hair but an ugly face, and we all
called him Chaka. : )
So when I would see the name Chaka scrawled everywhere, it would make me smile...
One day I was watching KTLA news, and there was a smiling, sweet- faced Mexican youth
surrounded by reporters, on his way to the courthouse. It was Chaka.
Chaka, as it turns out, was trying to make a name for himself as the most prolific tagger.
And apparently he'd succeeded, because here he was surrounded by the media and brought
up on charges.
What actually happened, if I recall correctly: he was leaving the courthouse after being
sentenced for his tagging crimes. And he tagged "Chaka" in the elevator, and got busted right then, AGAIN! LOL
I'd swear that really happened!
Another funny thing about riding the bus at this time was the hair juice. Those unfamiliar
with the ways of riding the bus could be in for a face full of hair juice, if they didn't watch out.
Here and there, on all the windows, would be these little greasy puffball marks. If you didn't
know, and fell asleep with your head against the window, you'd get this greasy goo on you. Hair juice, from everyone's Jeri curls, where they fell asleep with their heads against the window.
It was the 80's-90's. People were all wearing jeri curls back then.
The prostitutes in the old neighborhood used to stand under a sign across the street, the "Goodbody's Mortuary" sign. Not kidding. I'm sure they realized the joke. I always meant to
take a camera and get pictures of that...
I used to have to take the bus early in the morning, sit at the bus stop on the boulevard and watch the hos glare at me, and the johns try to pick up on me. Finally the ladies sent an
emissary to question me. " You workin?"
This was when I first appeared on the boulevard. They didn't know what to think. Was I
a new ho? Or was I taking the bus, legit? The bus stops were also for Ho business.
And yet they were smart enough to not confront me in a fighting
manner. I'm fairly tall, and unafraid of a few sucked-up crack hos. And they must have
known that. I was looking at them just as much as they were looking at me, curious. But finally one of the hos came over and asked me. " You working?"
Once they found out I was ok, not "working" they relaxed. Came over and chatted and bummed cigs out of me.
I got to recognize them pretty well. The Latina with beautiful legs and a messed up face.
I remember when I first saw her, short black skirt and beautiful body. She turned around
and yikes. Bad acne scars, really bad. All over.
The older hos, the fat hos. The sucked- up scrawny hos.
I was probably the only white girl that could
walk in my neighborhood completely unmolested or disrespected, after dark. The only other
white girl I'd seen was a ho, in a fight with another ho. She had a stick, the other one had a knife.
That was up close and personal, too. I was walking down the street when they came up close to me( Accidentally. They only had eyes for each other).
But anyway, I became familiar with the ladies.
An awful incident happened one morning when the pimp was there...
We were all at the bustop, they had forty ouncers, I had cigarettes. A regular six a.m. party.
For them, anyway.
So we are talking, I think I was telling this one grandmother how young she really did look,
etc. Passing the time.
Suddenly, from behind, someone pushes me. I turn around, and it's someone I've never seen
before. A dweebish looking white guy with glasses. He has an expression of unpleasant surprise
on his face.
" Oh! I'm sorry! I thought you were someone else!"
That's ok, I say.
Except it wasn't ok, to pimp guy. Older black man. I guess he felt kind of pretective of me,
something, because as my bus pulled up I said " I have to go, you guys! Bye!"
They were literally beating the crap out of that guy. And I couldn't prevent it because I had to go! I think I may have said " Oh no, it's ok!"trying to stop them when they were advancing on the guy. But they were set on defending me, apparently.
I think that was actually rather sweet, in a twisted way. They were looking out for me, trying
to protect me. I had apparently inspired their sense of honor. : )
Ah, riding the bus.
posted by Nabonidus at 7:10 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home